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“Well then why?!” I said firmly, lowering my voice to a fierce whisper. “Why would the American Government do such a thing? What is the point? These letters” I pointed at the envelope “Make it sound like it’s purely or the amusement of a select few government officials. Now, decades later, that’s still the case? That’s it?”

He nodded. “Well, partly. They still get a kick out of it. That’s the main reason. But there’s two other reasons. First, it’s good money. Think about it. If there were no moon, there would be no moon-themed posters. There would be no songs about “men in the moon” or whatever it is. There would be no moon-themed anything. Books… movies…. hell, even keychains. It goes on and on. There’s a lot of money at stake. And secondly, if they suddenly said “Well, that was fun” and turned off the satellite, people would go mad from confusion and transform into ravaging hordes of lunatics, beating each other senseless, howling at…. well, they wouldn’t be howling at the moon, now would they!” he gave me a crooked smile and stirred his drink “No, they wouldn’t be howling at the moon at all” he murmured. “The solution is to educate the public about the deception, and then storm into the Nevada desert 100,000 strong and disarm the satellite. Simple as that. Are you in?”


“You still have doubts, is that it?” he snapped

“Well… I… I guess I find it hard to believe that every single human being before the year 1917 was crazy. That they all hallucinated the same exact thing… I mean, it just doesn’t make any sense”

“Yes it does. It makes perfect sense. I repeat: those people were crazy”

“All of them?”

“Yes. All of them. Well, all the ones who believed in the moon, at least”
“Huh…” I stroked my chin thoughtfully

“So, again: are you in?”

“I’m in” I said firmly.

And that’s that. I am now doing my job to educate the public about the deception. To sum up:

1. There is no moon. It is a satellite image that has been beamed up from the Nevada desert since 1917 to deceive the public for the amusement of a few government officials. There are also secondary motives, such as money

2. People before 1917 were crazy, and when they claimed to see the moon, it was probably just the opium talking

So spread the word. Tell your family and friends the truth about the moon. And someday, we shall tear down that satellite of deception, and erase that glowing ball of lies from the sky.